An Ode to Nature

Total dullness.

Rusted in mind and heart.

Creativity fallen rotten.

Seeing without insight.

There's a place that in the whimsical visions of my mind,

It beckons the subconsciously alert part.

"Come find me" it says

And behold I go searching:

In the forest, where the trees behave with season

On the mountains, where the speed of the wind fills my lungs whole.

In the oceans and seas, when breathlessness I feel.

At the beaches, the sunrises and sunsets have made a prisoner of my soul.

Everywhere I went

I left a part of me behind and brought back some of you,

Now, I am becoming you:

The arrows of swooping sunlight through the trees

The crispy dew fog on early mountain

That blue starfish on the shore.

The froth of a waterfall.

I'm losing myself into you.

I will slowly disintegrate into a million pieces and become your atom.

Until then, beckon me to places, to parts I can steal.

To parts of me I can leave behind.

---An ode to nature. Thank you for rescuing me.

 

Wanting to be touched .. to feel the presence of the one you love.
That urge, that anticipation, that disappointment when it doesn't happen.
I'm not sure how people make long distance relationships work.
Living in the same city and not being able to see each other's face, observe each other's habits, or talk whenever needed, leaves me broken..if not overwhelmed.

Meeting each other is just a normal thing to you.. I secretly hope not.
I hope you feel it precious and a moment you'd love to cherish.

But don't cherish it too much that you'd feel it's enough.

I need you to need me.

They say you shouldn't depend on others to make you happy.
But if you make me happy, why can't I depend on you ?
Cause dependency only disappoints.
Expectations disappoint more.

I want to have so many experiences with you.

You're always stuck in your own tornado of your things, it tears my soul to see I've been lost in that blurriness of the tornado.

We needn't have to always say yes to each other.
But what about the important things that matter.
Isn't that why we loved... cause we found a companion who understands what's important to us and supports us.
"Just cause I love you I cannot support you for everything", you mention.

No, I just need you to support me when I need you by being there.

I want us to be special. Not the social media kinda special.
But I want to be your special person. Someone you look at with pride and love.
Someone who makes you feel warm when you love.

I'm scared you've lost that place for me.

Many feminists may say "Women need only themselves".

No, I need someone to need me dearly: out of respect, out of love, out of meaning.

Hold my hand when I don't expect it.
Plan a quiet trip with me and not cancel it.
Tell me you miss me and you'd like to see my face.
Don't just stand there, come over close and wipe my tears instead of saying "My friends are waiting".
Make plans with me, instead of telling me you're not sure if you'll be free.
Look at me in the eye and tell me I'm pretty when I come dressed to meet you.
Smile at me across the room in the crowd.

We gave life to this love we felt.
We're only struggling so hard to keep it thriving.
We're not magicians.
We're only human to want more.

The only thing I ask and I beg, please keep me close to your heart and don't stop there.

Let me know that's where I belong.

I'll hug you so tight that you would feel my heart beat in yours

I love you so much

I Love you so much that I'd want to rip myself from my skin and enter into yours, and become one with you.

I love you

If I could love like the rain,
That bursts forth from it's clouds,
Only to be drunk by the thirsty dust,
To become one and bring forth life.

If I could love like warm sunshine,
That breaks away and travels a million miles,
To wake up the flowers with a kiss,
Making them bloom full with blushing bliss.

If I could love like the breeze,
That wraps itself onto the trees,
Moving with aggression into branches and leaves,
To sway as one and make music.

If I could love like the mountains,
Strong and sturdy rising high,
To touch the body of the sky,
To nuzzle the clouds with it's peak.

If I could love like you,
So pure and caring and true,
Life would be beautiful reality.
But I am not you,
And the beauty of life may have faded away.
Yet I can still love,
And I love you.

Sinner

I am the hurt that wrecked your soul,
The wound that tore away you whole,
A lie that contaminated your life.
I am but a sinner.

I am the darkness that consumed your light.
Took away your peace, weakened your might,
Buried your dreams under my selfish plight,
The filth that tainted your trusting sight.

You gave me the right to brighten your heart,
To be your love, To be your most important part,
But I, in all my pomp and pride,
Broke it into a million pieces.

I am but a shallow being,
Undeserving of  kindness you bestowed,
A filth that tarnished all your hopes and dreams,
Only pain and questions have I endowed.

Disgust is all I will ever be,
For scarring your life with agony,
I breached the love that loved me,
I will always your sinner be.

--- Repentance of a Perpetrator.

For the love of my Life

My desktop tick tocks at 12:18am.

I'm awake .. not feeling sleepy.

Crack as I am.. I wish to hear you drive by my window

The fan's just swishing up a noise

My red and brown curtains are adorably moving to the mid-night breeze

Suddenly ! A blues or a jazz or a whatever tune churns up my mind revealing lyrics.

"Many people come and go,

But you're here to stay

To be my rainbow

On a rainy day

It's a fast forward motion

Oh,This thing called love

But with you it feels just alright

Everything slows down

Just you and me in this while

Let the stars keep moving

Let the sun keep shining

Let the birds all fly away

Let the path seem winding

Let the lights keep dimming

It don't matter

Cause you're here to stay

Like a rainbow

Across from night to day"

I can sing it right now..

I will forget when i wake up in the morning

Maybe I just lost a record breaking tune to sleep

But... The lyrics spilled into my mind

Like, I just knocked a jar of tune and it spilled words

Dear song,

I may not remember, in the future, the tune that embodies you.

But while you're staying hidden, all I ask is for you to meet me some day.

You and I can make great things happen.

--- Love yours,
       Me

Missing

I think one of the 'saddest' feelings is missing 'the special person', even when you're close.
Well... It's more like losing a person to a circumstance.
You remember "those" times. Nostalgia. Secret dreams dreamt silently, Favourite songs - melodious ones added to the playlist, quietly watching the smile form and grow on the other's face, making lists of little unconventional yet true tasks to accomplish, feeling fresh drops of drizzle, an apple shared with ease, wind-chimes  mountains and drives, and sudden pleasant shocks felt by the other's presence.

There comes a time what others label as 'the next phase' or 'growing out of it' . 
It's purely circumstantial .
One gets busy and the other has no time. 
Same experiences cannot be relived.

The scary part is what if 'both' get used to growing out of it.

My oldie 'John Black' has a perfect timing.
During such a soliloquy in my mind I received a message from him :

'When love is tried as loved ones change,
Hold still to hope though all seems strange,
Till ease returns and love grows wise,
Through listening ears and open eyes.'

A lot of time has passed since this message.
I definitely vouch for it as more than a mere saying !
We've all heard clichéd proverbs of life not being a bed of roses, and everyday not being Christmas.
I realise that it's not as much as 'growing out of it',but rather 'growing deeper into it' is the understanding that's needed.
While a deeper sentiment gradually streams through both; favourite tracks, secret dreams, wind-chimes and sudden pleasant shocks take a step aside to make way for something whole and non-tarnishable , but they remain.

Prayer for the Perpetrator

Dear God,
I recognize the evil of my behavior.
I ask forgiveness for the pain I've cause someone else.
Forgive me, God, and cleanse my heart.
Most of all, Dear Lord, please send your angels to release me from my yearnings to do again as I have done.
May God cast out this evil from within me.
May I be returned somehow, through your grace, dear God, to the ways of goodness.
Please bless and protect those who have been victims of my perpetration.
May my life be somehow lifted up that I might be redeemed and receive from you the chance to live the rest of my life on the path of good, through the grace of God and in service to humanity forever and forever.
Amen.

Marianne Williamson.

A feeling called heaven

There's a feeling we all call heaven,

A feeling that makes us come alive,

A feeling when comfort spreads it's wings, 

A feeling we cannot hide.

You can name it your mother's embrace,

Or your father's accommodating lap,

It could be late night talks with your sibling,

Or petting your pooch 'Flap'.

It could be the solace found in your work,

Or the five minute joint relieving coffee break,

A kind act shown by a stranger on a bad day,

Or a midnight binging of dark chocolate cake.

Heartfelt messages sent by that special someone,

Cool Breeze on a hot summer's night,

Laughing aloud with a best friend,

Make-up kiss after a fight.

Definitely a good massage at a spa,

When someone compliments your inner glow,

When you get that recipe right,

When your children admire your halo,

When living becomes an endless dark tunnel,

These moments become our light,

Our heaven is because of Angels around us,

Always keep them in your sight.

Change

Change..
Change : The word seems a bit terrorising to some of us. 
Incorporating something different in our lives just seems like more of an agonising fact to deal with.
And for some of us... Change just means allowing fresh events and routines to replace a stagnant and monotonous way of life.
As true as how scary change can get, and drive you out of your easy chair, it's what keeps us hooked to life.
Unexpected things happening...
Expected things not happening...
The rusted part is  when 'Nothing happens'.


For me, right now, I need some change.
Change of clothes, change of hairstyle, Change of phone, Change of place, Change of position, Change of accessories, Change of knowledge, Change of routine, Change of 'marital status' , Change of attitude...
A part of me wants to be on my toes not allowing me to get too settled down with my life.
The problem : Once you get too settled in your seat, you're mind is gonna one day find your hind  getting numb and wanting for more action. 
Expectations will arise.
Life will not be able to keep up.
And you'll be another 'COMPLAINER'.


It's just another dull, tubelight, white and blue cubicle day at office.
I'm finding it so hard to stay settled in my chair.
If only I had a Y chomosome and a car, I'd drive away to a greener place...
I need a to change how my cubicle looks.
Change it to look like a green garden and set free some tamed butterflies.


Most of the times we keep fighting to change things we can't.
I'm only human with two hands which end with bitten nails.
For now, I have to work.
Learn something new.
I'll just do that.. just for now (wink).

Tune

My desktop tick tocks at 12:18am.

I'm awake .. sleep hasn't arrived yet.

Crack as I am.. I wish to hear you drive by my window.

The fan's just swishing up a noise.

My red and brown curtains are adorably moving to the mid-night breeze.

Suddenly ! A blues or a jazz or a whatever tune churns up my mind revealing lyrics.

"Many people come and go,

But you're here to stay

To be my rainbow

On a rainy day

It's a fast forward motion

Oh,This thing called love

But with you it feels just alright

Everything slows down

Just you and me in this while

Let the stars keep moving

Let the sun keep shining

Let the birds all fly away

Let the path seem winding

Let the lights keep dimming

It don't matter

Cause you're here to stay

Like a rainbow

Across from night to day"

I can sing this song right now..

I will forget when i wake up in the morning.

Maybe I just lost a record breaking tune to sleep.

But... The lyrics spilled into my mind.

Like, I just knocked a jar of tune and it spilled words !

Dear song,

I may not remember, in the future, the tune that embodies you.

But while you're staying hidden, all I ask is for you to meet me some day.

You and I can make great things happen.

Love.

between us

We meet various genres of personalities.

Some we look forward to meet.

Some we avoid.

Some we just have to tolerate.

But the ones we most definately hate is a rude edgy fella... especially one whose insolence is driven by their puffed-up egotistical self-applauding attitude.

I did have a personal experience of my own with one such 'i've got red ants in my pants' sorta guy.

Its upsetting.

Not because their attitude is just a piece of sewage... but more because you really can't do anything about it because of your present circumstance.

At one such moment I asked my oldie 'John Black' for some support and advise.

He said, "Sometimes you just have to be silent cause you don't want to get down to their level"

I further enquired if it would be fine to let the person know how uncanny he's been.

He added, "Stand up for yourself if you have to... But remember 'Donkeys don't evolve into stallions !' "

just a thought

Said the earth to the sky "My Lord, My Darling, no longer can i stay away from thee"

Lo ! He rained down into her being, "Behold i've come only with you to be !"

No title

I wish I could watch the sunset with you,

There are so many things for us to do !

Hear winchimes ringing sweetly in the air,

Watch birds flying in a pair,

Catch raindrops running down each other's cheek,

Climb all the way up a mountain peak,

Walk through the aisle of a sunflower field ,

Send love messages on a beach inside bottles sealed,

Pet little puppies on the road,

Dream of having St. Bernards and a Retriever Gold,

Peek at the moon rising behind the leaves,

Plan a mock robbery like a pair of thieves,

Rate food from different places on a score of ten,

Draw a million drawings with pencil and a pen,

Talk of a billion dreams under the water tank,

Pull your hair and play a prank,

Enjoy dinner on a windy rooftop,

Run away from the van of a cop,

Shoot many mad photos together,

Follow birds and pick up their feather,

Gift each other red roses,

Touch fishes and play with their noses,

So get well soon, right now, will you !

There are many more things for us to do !

No title

I'll take a minute or two

to take a quiet walk beside you

Maybe we can have a hushed word

or a silent giggle

Maybe i'll count the stars tonight

while you rid the stones from my path

Maybe I'll just watch your eyes

as they peacefully blink

Maybe i'll make sure to see that smile

while you watch me jump over cockroaches

Maybe i'll naughtily nudge you

So you can nudge me back too

Maybe i'll hum your favourite tune

to hear you sing along

Maybe i'll brush my hand against yours

so i can feel your warmth

Or maybe I'll just take a quiet walk beside you

Cause you love to walk beside me too

No title

What if one of days called 'i don't feel important' comes across your path !? Most of us wait for someone to make us feel special: To make us the top of their priority list. And we obviously wait in anticipation and blind notion that 'someone' will make us feel belonged and important. Oh how we crave for those days when someone remembers we exist and celebrates us being in their lives. A long forgotten hug or kiss acquired, is treasured dearly within the deepest depths of our fragile hearts so that its feeling may never leave us... may never wear away. Hence most of us may remember our 'first kiss' or 'first touch' or 'first hug' or 'first smile' or 'time spent together' with endearing fondness !

We wish maybe someone will go that extra mile and try atleast.

We know the saying 'Depend on none for your happiness, for happiness comes from within'.

Well... I wouldn't really back up that quote, for the outside plays an equal role to making us happy from the inside. Gosh ! You can't keep hugging yourself forever... You need a hug from another as well !

We all know the 'worthless' feeling.

We cry. We cry some more. We cry louder. We pick up a kerchief. We wipe our tears. We look into the mirror to make sure our eyes are red no more. We smile to make ourselves better. We smile to make our expression go into the 'neutral' mode. We smile to hide our tears. We resume 'natural' form. And the day goes on.

But somewhere... we're still crying at the back of our minds.

It's good to cry... It really helps. It's like letting the 'sadness monster' go.

We know we must let go of one thing to gain another. So I guess that's the same logic with sadness and happiness.

A friend told me 'You're as important as everyone else' and I just wanted to puke. The last thing you want to be told is that you're importance is no greater than the next person. In a general philosophical sense, he may be right. But I wasn't brooding about being important to the world. Cause to the world I'm just a person. I wanted to feel like 'The World' to someone.

Such crappy days make their presence felt, either seldom or often. And most of the times somehow, something or someone may come along to cheer you up.

And for the times when you just keep waiting in vain for something or someone to come, just understand... Sleeping helps. Wake up and face the sun. And cry if you must in your bath, but most importantly believe there's a nice bakery waiting down the road waiting for you to gorge on its finest biscuits, or a cute puppy wallpaper waiting to hear your giggle, or a luxurious spa waiting to enhance your being or a simple smile waiting to be passed on from 'someone' to you or maybe a nice message sent to you at the end of the day by the one who needs you :)

no music

There's a confusion,

A puzzling notion,

A mixed emotion,

And the rain doesn't stop to pour !

Teeny tiny raindrops,

Clingling like unfallen teardrops,

Transcending every feeling that crops,

Into something that's not meant to be real !

The room's getting bigger,

Makin me feel smaller,

The air's getting thinner,

Oh when will I fall !

I've been waiting to feel this feeling,

Oh yes it's raining,

And this is real,

And I'm falling... falling for you !

no title

It's no smooth sail ,But yet it's more like you need to keep pinching yourself to remember to not stop - Cause the moment you stop you begin to stink, We all know that stagnant waters stink.

Short tempers get to you ,you find yourself getting angry all the time and you begin to use all that extra energy into shouting and breaking things or simply getting frustrated and you hear voices yelling "You Stink" and hence the phrase :You begin to Stink.

I've heard people say that there's no magic bullet ,though most of the times you would only wish from the bottom of your heart that there would be this "Let-them-Undertstand" sort of tranqulising pellet or portion : They say nothing's impossible to man - So here's an idea I'm willing to share with the R&D ( If it works make sure you pass on atleast 30% of your profits , I can sure use that to buy cameras and set up my own Gallery )

My Captain always reminded me that 'I am who I am' because of the people around me : If I can love , If I can fight or have a threshold for pain it's all because people with their own 'uncanny' behaviours have influenced mine .If I could consider the fact that God answered my prayers, and made them the way I'd prefer them to be, then I'd also have to adjust with me not being me.

But that's totally not acceptable.

Maybe I have those days of Blue... But I've also had my share of "Moments" : Making a crowd sing to my beat ,A happy puppy following me, Pleasant greens beautifying my mind ,A long happy discussion with people who are always ready to help or just feeling the feeling of being loved .

They say that you have to know what being sad is so that you can enjoy the beauty of happiness .

That's so true.

I know people will never see my point , They may never be able to "Get into my Shoes" !

Nobody is going to stop you from complaining, But don't stop others from complaining either - You can be the one on the 'Other side' too.

I know it's not a smooth sail,

You may start feeling hopeless and frail,

But as the storm keeps getting strong,

And the journey only seems to be getting long,

Just breathe and gather all your might,

The answer may not always be 'A Fight',

Just keep the focus on your way,

The storm that once threatened you, may take you to Your bay.

Let them see

You're just another person,
It's another ordinary day,
You're trying to make through it,
In your own special way.

They're trying to blinden,
All that you believe,
They're gonna make it hazy,
You better run...Go flee !

You find yourself fighting,
Falling all the time,
You're gonna try standing,
You're difference is your crime.

So stop running,
Cause they'll never stop to chase,
Just turn back !
Let them see your face !

Cause when they do,
They're no longer gonna see your back but you,
And they'll know that behind the ordinary,
Lies a spirit they can't subdue !

The Moment

When everything begins to feel nil,
It's your hand on my Heart that makes it still.
When scares and frights make me cold,
I find comforting warmth in your hold.


When my mind with questions blind,
When solutions seem hard to find,
Your smile and and your nod soothes me,
It calms the tranquility of my sea.


A naughty twinkle in your eye,
A gentle squeeze of my hand,
A sweet kiss on my cheek,
Without these, my world would be so bleak.


I'll walk beside you at all times,
Be it a journey short or long,
Cause the moment you took my hand in yours,
I knew only to you can my heart belong...

just a thought

If you were given a chance...a "privileged" opportunity to strip yourself of two things : your actual age and "behave your age" theories, what is that you would do ?

Laugh loudly and run amidst a sunflower field under the afternoon sun without having to use a sunscreen, with the yellows warming you more than the afternoon sunshine...

Not thinking twice about your Rs.2500 branded jean whilst getting dirty sliding down a mushy rain washed path or jumping into a puddle...

Suck nectar from wild plants...

Make mud pots and deliberately allow the sand to get into your pedicured nails...

Walk bare foot on unkempt grass...

Eat ice lollies and ice candies in the rain even when you have a bad cold...

Play "who gets on who" with your dog and eat food with the same hands...

Draw apples and oranges and remember that you've forgotten how to hold a pencil...

Try to make spit bubbles...

Hold an insect in your hands without being threatened by it...

Pee under the stars while travelling on the highway irrespective of your gender...

Some of these may sound unhygienic, make you go red with shame and may tempt you to just pick your phone and fix an appointment with a neurologist for me .

Thank you .

But if you could stop for a while : stop this very moment to observe the chances you have around you or even grab, to become innocent and impeccable, instead of talking about how "corrupt" everything is becoming, you'd stop dialing that number to the neurologist and probably just take a walk to the nearest store and buy yourself a lollipop.

Like a great man once said, " I'm a guy with a laptop in one hand and lollipop in the other... "

no title

Should I feel elated...filled with elan. I don't know.

This post is dedicated to the unpredictabilities of life because of which the 'stagnant order-of-life' that we choose to follow is removed by the flow of unconventional patterns. As I say this I can hear the sound of fresh clean waters of a stream flowing...in my virtual parallel universe I 'live' in .

It's kind of funny how we tend to 'exist' in the real world and choose to 'live' in that virtual-dreamy world of our own.

Right now I feel like going into a spiritual realm : Cutting through all the vines of relationships, work, materials, plans, thoughts, desires....I guess "The" books are rubbing off on me. It's more like you want to feel a warm light that will enhance every frame of your life with a feel of a sepia glow

"I am reminded of a man who called himself a bird . Oh ! How I wanted to fly with him...I thought that's what freedom is all about : To have no boundaries, to let go as you take off, to spread your wings and let the forces and the energy of the surrounding maneuver you and decide your path..."

Yea...What a life that would be...no thoughts...no confusion over making choices...No end to the journey .... just a virtual horizon !

I tried this and my 'within' proclaimed me "A lazy, aimless fool, not worthy of making use of your built in resources" ! Oops......

no title

It's a pretty chilly night. We walk down amidst a crowd of orange clad devotees to the shrine of the Blessed Virgin Mary in Shivajinagar.
The path is filled with vendors selling food, mostly 'dil pasand', spices, second hand clothes and toys which exude exciting colourful lights.
It's a fair of its own kind.

Holding a pair of candles planted in a roll of red roses, I walked along the path, with an aura of prayer and faith encompassing me. Putting
my faith in the intercession of the Blessed Virgin Mary, I begin to pray for the things I feel I should receive....a good job, a good salary, a
little of this and some more of that and it goes on and on and then .... a sight grips me !

I see a boy of about 10 years, holding in the warmth of his arms, his sister of about 5 years. Their clothes, hair, hands and eyelashes were caked with dirt. Beside them was a little steel saucer, in which was placed a bun and a 1 rupee coin. They sat along the path, nodding off to sleep. No cold, no hunger and no noisy crowd could ever disturb them. It was a sight that could well up anybody's eyes with tears.

Here I was praying for my 'wants' with my parents checking on me every 5 mins to make sure my little sister and me weren't lost in the crowd, and here were these two little impeccable souls who, unmindful of their poverty, found comfort in the warmth of the other. I saw no sign of their parents....I saw no sign of any guardian or caretaker and yet, they slept in peace.

I had nothing to give them.... I couldn't pray anymore.

I looked into the sky filled with lights from the church and the only two words that crossed my mind were "Bless them".

I've heard and read alot about people being inspired about 'deeper meaning of life' and letting go of their wants, whilst coming across experiences that have chisled out a heart of humanity from a heart of greed. It wouldn't make sense unless you'd personally feel the blow of 'the hammer'.

Some of us do alot to make the world a better place....and some of us may find ourselves in the position that I was in.

I couldn't do much that day, except pray. They say that when prayers go up, blessings come down.

I'm grateful and thankful to God for all those who've helped make a difference in the lives of such under privileged children, and for those of us who want to do so much, but do not find ourselves in a position to do so, don't worry.

Your thoughts of wanting to do something for them will churn out a blessing.

Just don't stop the thought.

art attack

Birthday and a Bridge !

inspirations

"Look unto me, not that your cross may shorten,

But because I carry away all your burden"

just a thought

It's good that people don't think like you....It makes 'you' unique !

no title

I forgive,
I move on,

I am happy,

Now I am a promise fulfilled.

I read these lines written, with a black pen, atop a glass slab used to laminate a wooden table at my friend's place.

I woke up today to a cock-a-doodle-doo and the sunshine warming my feet and suddenly this question hit my mind !

If someone were to ask me what good have you learnt from life till date...what would I say ?

I thought ....and I smiled and I said to myself "It's gotta be love".

One of the greatest things that love teaches you to do is to let go and most importantly, to forgive. I may sound like one of those daily philosophers tryin hard to make his point about love and the wonders it can do. Well yeah it can do a lot of wonders...but I don't intend to sound like those enlightened few who've attained salvation in the course of finding beauty and truth .

No.

I'm just a commoner...an ordinary person, trying to make through everyday with what I've been blessed with - a hint of unconventionality.

So I write this, cause I want to share.

I feel like a little rag picker kid who just found a clean empty note book in a pile of garbage and he just wants to give it to a friend who loves to draw, so that he can now draw in a clean book.

I've read alot of quotes about love and forgiveness and moving on and letting go.

Yes, they've been very touching and inspirational.

But 'these' few lines...only these few lines made me understand how worthy forgiveness can make one feel.

Well I agree that it's not the easiest to do...But it's not the hardest thing to do either !

Find something that you genuinely love .... it could your little sister who can make a good meal for all your friends when they drop in, your friends who just have nothing else but ounces of love for you and accept all the bull shit you give them, the way you respect your collection of books, the toy at your window that spins when the wind blows, the wind chime tingling tenderly and reminding you of twinkling stars, the neem tree just outside your window that keeps your room feeling fresh, floors that shine because you've cleaned them, walking on red oxide floors, folding your pants and dipping your legs in a stream whilst disobeying your mom, walking away to explore hither and thither with your 256MB camera phone without paying heed to the ghosts of the afternoon that abide by the lotus lake, the sky and its intriguing hues, knowing that there's a canvas awaiting to serve its purpose, the thought of peacock blues and silvery pea greens and milky whites, the walls of your room painted with earthy creamy coffee chocolate browns, the thought of weird food combinations like mango duet and chicku, a song called way back into love, the little kitty cat which you want to call pussy but you can't cause it sounds odd, the thought of feeling sedated and intoxicated while thinking of that someone special, dreaming of being a good dancer someday...

The world is filled with so much of beauty !

"Run away as fast as u can...as far as u can, without turning back,"they say.

The only thing I did was to keep loving ...this is what taught me that once you begin this act of finding things to love and start linking them up....you can never stop yourself from getting involved in this chain.

You just find no time to be miserabe or hurt anymore...who'd wanna waste those precious moments sulking in the dark corner of one's room while one can take a walk in the drizzle or savour the taste of hot maggi noodles on a rainy day !

No..don't be a hypocrite and wear a fake expression like everything's alright.

Feel the pain. It could be Intense...well, it will be intense.

Don't just leave it to time...do something about it.

But don't run away. Go for it. Conquer it !

Then one morning instead of waking up with a heavy heart and swollen eyes and wet pillow covers...You'll wake up to the cock-a-doodle-doo and the sun warming your toes !

Blasphemy #6

"Why aren't you writing Puttsi ?"
"If tomorrow anyone asks me where I'm working and I say Puttsi...They will not give me girl to marry"

must try

If you are returning home on a hot afternoon and you have to take a BMTC...don't worry .

Find a nice shady seat near the window to get maximum air......especially because you want the wind to play with your hair and take away all your tensions and give you some freshness .

Take out your cell put on the radio....and whilst passing a scenic place .....like a bridge over a lake at K.R.Puram ....make sure you tune into hindi retro numbers....most probably on 101.3 .

You'd actually be caught by coincidence ......cause your favourite number would be playing then !

Retro numbers are good and classic....

If you've ever forgotten how beautiful and meaningful they are ,then this is 'the moment' when you're gonna be listening to every word of that song and savouring it like some rare delicacy !

The melody will take a tour of all your senses ,releasing every ache and most importantly reviving your 'naughty' nature and your bent shoulder !

You'll find yourself involved.....take my word !

It will fill your heart with a whole lot of peace and memories to relive .

You can't help ,but just give in and smile from your heart .

Well it happened to me....and yes ....it was "The Moment" !

Try the Kishore Kumar and Lata combo .....They'll leave you young and full of romance!

just a thought

"They say this and that .

But I don't want to limit your being to my mind !

I don't want to conceptualize...

I don't want to draw a boundary.....

Go free ! "

MUST TRY

Fresh Strawberry Milkshake and Chesse Grilled Sandwich at Casio ,Jeevan Bhimanagar ,Indiranagar

.Made out of luscious juicy strawberries and chilled .....with a string of chocolate designed to garnish your shake and filled in a long narrow glass which is so holdable(..u don't want to let go) .The rim of the glass has a slice of "reddened" strawberry that burts in your mouth, giving you a trailor of what to expect from the milkshake .

The Cheese Grilled sadnwich ,served hot and topped with a hint of butter ,has generous melted cheese that fills your mouth with every bite .The best part are those few bites that emerge tangy becasue of the chat powder sprinked in just the right amount . Innovative I'd say !

Fresh Strawberry Milkshake : Rs.20
Cheese Grilled Sandwich : Rs.25

inspirations

I go to my terrace ,singing a song to the stars .
Thinking....pondering....wondering....wishing....assuming....planning....step by step I climb....stomping my feet to the rhythm in my mind !
I'm pleased with myself....I'm too good at this beat thing !
I can sing to the beat of my stomping feet or my snapping finger or the ticking clock .....and most importantly to the beat of my own "lupp-dupp"(that's the sound of heart beating...for those who didn't care to read it in your biology books !)

"So I can be a singer : I know my voice...I know my parts....I can choose the right songs that compliment my voice.....I close my eyes and let myself sing from within ,at church . People give me a thumb's up when I let my vocal cords do the music .They like it .
I'll be doing what I want everyday of my life !"

But it doesn't sound like the thing I need .

............................................................................................

I look through my album....it's got colours beautifully merged ,one into the other ,on cardboard sheets.....I love glancing through my paintings .
It gives me sense of pride that I have been "chosen" to be gifted with a good sense of colour .
I can mix and splash and add and deepen and intensify .
I'm impressed .

"Imagine this room you can walk into everyday and see reflections of yourself in every handmade work of yours....how you felt whilst working on this splash of green and blue....or that merge of orange and yellow !
It's glorious....
Someday I'll share it with the world .
I'll have exhibitions.
People will simply adore me .I'll sell some .They will buy .
I'll be doing what I want everyday of my life !"

Errr.....I know I need inspiration to come along if I need to paint .
That happens very rarely .
Hence every painting of mine is precious .It has a part of me !
How can I give a part of me to every Tom,Dick and Harry .....worse still ,for a price ?
I'm priceless .
I can give it only to those who consider me the same .
This is out of question !

...................................................................................................

I am adventurous .I love to run.....seriously !
Maybe I'm a bit too healthy to be able to move fast ....but still, I can move .
I love greenery....I love fresh air....I love to breathe and gather the freshness in me .
I love sunrises n sunsets ,streams and unprotected bridges , cliffs and it's edges ,forts and their histories ........

"Photographer then...you've taken few lovely pics .People have acknowledged
it's worth .
Ummm.....Mountaineer ?....You can climb and explore .
Go on undiscovered expeditions .
But.....What about a writer or a poet.......you're not bad....people have appreciated your thoughts .
I'll be doing what I want everyday of my life ! "

Will I..............?!!!!????(that means confusion !)

.................................................................................................

There's an alert bell that suddenly rings......
It's my conscience again...
I've not been paying much heed to it !
I knew the "alert" bell was due sometime......
It's been bugging me with thoughts like :

"You're confused ."
"Take care of this moment and the next moment will be taken care of "
"There's only one way : Forward"
"There's a deeper essence into finding your passion "
"Be the one to lead"
"You as an individual....represent the entire universe .Yes you do....!
You are not just the subset . But the totality of it .
There is a universe called 'you'........
Why the heck would you want to live as just the subset of it .
Singing, painting ,photography ,reading ,writing ,trekking ,drama ,intellect.....whatever it maybe ,is the universe you represent .
It is you ,in whole .
Passion is this 'black hole' into which your entire universe needs to be sucked into .
Passion is that 'one' thing where your wholeness is brought into focus ,to be tested ,to be tried ,to bear .

Once this is understood you live.....
You stop existing .....you begin to live .

You can go deeper trying to find the intricacies of life or just understand that all there is to it is ' living a simple ,yet meaningful life '

That's all.....

Being great neither means ruling the world nor retiring as a sage atop the mystifying himalayas .
You can climb the ladder and keep going higher and higher .
But one day you'd stop and then look down and call 'Hello is anybody watching me.....I'm lonely ....and it's getting cold '.......and there would be no reply....!
And it will hit your being really hard that no one cares cause you never did .
And you'd fall......and what a bad fall that would be !

Go higher if you must.....
But you need to know when it becomes too high and dangerous .

After all we remember legends : People who went beyond,not higher !

The only mantra they followed : Live a simple and meaningful life .
They chose the less travelled path .
They believed .
They let their universe take them through.....

And when you've done that you can jolly well wake up every morning and say :

'I am doing what I want......... everyday of my life !' "


-source : a conscience named johnblack